Valentine’s Day is finally here and everyone is in the mood for L-O-V-E. Each year more  than 141 million Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged, making Valentine’s Day the second-most popular greeting-card-giving occasion. And, while expressing your love in a greeting card is nice, it made me wonder how do we express our love on the other 364 days of the year? Are you in tune with your love language, or the love language of those around you?

 

Working your love language daily with whomever you encounter (spouse, children, co-worker, leaders, etc.) as well as knowing your own love language can be very rewarding. Gary Chapman, author of “The 5 Love Languages,” believes “that our deepest emotional need is the need to feel loved. Learning to communicate with others by speaking their primary love language creates a positive emotional climate where you learn to work together as a team—encouraging, supporting, and helping each other reach meaningful goals.”

 

The Five Love Languages that Chapman has identified are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Following are examples of the most common love languages that we use with our children, co-workers, and mates:

 

FOR YOUR CO-WORKERS:

Words of Affirmation

Everyone would like to hear a thank you, you are doing a good job or keep up the good work as a way of encouragement. In reality, you spend most of your day at work so learning to speak the language that connects you with your co-workers can only build them up

and help build morale for the company.

 

FOR YOUR MATE:

Receiving Gifts

When trying to express love to your mate, you want to speak their love language to make sure you get the desired results when expressing love for them. The language of receiving gifts tells us that our mate feels our love when we give them gifts.  The great thing about this is that price is not always a factor. Something as simple as picking fresh flowers can brighten her day or something as simple as a new tie can brighten his day.  When speaking the language of gifts, it’s the giving heart that wins your mate over and it sends a message that I am always thinking about you.


FOR YOUR CHILDREN:

Words of Affirmation

We must be careful of the words that we speak to our children daily. When you use words that encourage, motivate, build up and express parental love it will allow your child to face the world easier.  Avoid harsh words that affect their emotions and criticism in a way to get your child to respond to changes you would like to see.  These tactics never help and only hurt.

 

Quality Time

Quality time in the early years is precious to you and your child.  It helps promote growth, security, love and keeps the connection strong.  Our time with our son is valuable so we schedule family time which gives him an outlet to share his thoughts, the events of his week, even his thoughts concerning our home.  This time helps him to learn how to communicate his feelings and how to deal with certain situations at school, church and one day on his job. Gathering at least once a week for family dinner is always a time to be enjoyed.

 

FOR YOURSELF:

Acts of Service

Take the time to do something for yourself (decorating, writing, organizing, shopping, vacation etc.) is always important.  Don’t be afraid to tell yourself “I love me,” “I am worthy,” and “I am doing this for me.” This will set you free from false expectations from others. Know thyself, be true to thyself.

While these are just a few examples, the most important thing to remember is to keep the lines of communication open in all your relationships. The more we understand and respect each other, the easier it is to spread the love every day.